Tuesday poem #165 : Claire Lacey : SCAT 3

Concussion is a disturbance in brain function caused by a direct or indirect force

to the head. It results in a variety of non-specific signs and / or symptoms (some

examples listed below) and most often does not involve loss of consciousness.

Concussion should be suspected in the presence of

any one

or more

of the following:

1.

on you it’s snowing a disturbance. Symptoms should fog and stall. Direct stroke indirect. Please release me, my darling triggers atypical presentation. I miss music like I miss myself. The curve of the earth a skull flashing, drunken ship lilts and suspected. Out of focus, e.g., unsteadiness, e.g., not tracking, e.g., shutters, e.g., pick up a glass of water and the wind outside it’s dark and the syllables unslung: I’m all alone in here, what if there’s a murderer, a man with an axe and a grin and the glass shatters, my hand forgotten its purpose.

2.

You’ve got red on you. It’s day 5 and I

can read but every sentence carries a cost.

I read anyways to stop the chatter.

If I read for 10 minutes the pain escalates.

Who is this stranger weeping in my bed? If

20 minites, unslung syllables when eye

compensation fatigues, snowy vision,

hypnothermia rolls in, fogging up the works.

Broekn, I think. Borken.

I can’t see the shape of it; is this a poem?

NOTE:

A hit to the head can sometimes be associated with a more serious brain

injury. Any of the following warrants consideration of activating emergency pro-

cedures and urgent transportation to the nearest hospital:

2.

The sea sucks

the river out with a straw,
leaving sludge slashed
with steel sky. Fog hunches

where the sun sets. Donut and ice cream

stalls shutter, last customers still licking

chops. It was a one two punch: shoulder to skull.

Deviation from baseline reveals cognitive dysfunction.

A year and half a world later,

the coast guard station illuminates

officers in yellow safety vests buzzing into radios;

four put on life preservers, climb into a rescue craft
towed by a tractor flashing blue lights.

They set off, too slow it seems, but speed

is hard to judge when riverbed stretches

over horizon. Back home in the foothills the horizon

hangs at 115.6km, give or take, but we are lower

here at the Humber, closer to the curve

of the earth. Soon they shrink

to flashing blue, still no offing in sight.

3.

“I am going to test your memory. I will read you a list of words and when I am done, repeat back as many words as you can remember, in any order.”

I think I’m having a stroke. Numbness
ice sharp spikes into my left side, skull

tectonics shaking down my spine, my

jaw my eye trembling skyscrapers no longer
straight cracked foundations. Danny’s not

here Mrs Torrance.

Blubbering snot runs

into my mouth moving

hurts I cry and want

my dog back

my mummy

anybody

please.

Heartbreak begins in the head, numbskull.

Every sentence carries a cost, and this

is my independence. You shouldn’t be alone,

the doctor said, go to emergency if there is any numbness

or tingling, but I don’t anticipate you will need to.

This is worse than numbness or

tingling, this is all the words like agony and

stabbing and motherfucking

 Call 911 (every sentence) call 911 (carries) call 911 (accost) please

but my body just lies.

5.

“I am going to repeat the same list again. Repeat back as many words as you can remember in any order, even if you said the word before.”

Helena: the blizzard triggers

staggering, sparkles like another

shot to the skull, no I’m not okay.

I hope the deer hits the car

so that everyone else survives.

This use of pronouns is forced

geometry unable to comply.

I know I have something to say,

the facial tic rolls

it into a ball beside

my tongue,

resting in my left cheek.

6.

It’s raining
It’s pouring

Sparkle is snoring
She went to bed
And bumped her head

And never got up in the morning.

7.

At least, sometimes I think that’s how it goes.

6.

On the porch, the snow that isn’t

here falls beautiful and thick in front of the evergreens.

Church bells aren’t ringing, there are no

churches. I meander like a drunkard,

pace the baseball diamond, a klutz waltz:

neuromuscular shamble of muscles not firing

and vestibular injury.

I realize I am replicant, a cyborg malfunction.

One two scuff.  “Mrs Palmer, there are things dark

and heinous
in this world.”

Practice makes perfect as I take the SCAT test again

and again (but every sentence carries a cost).

In the dark, wishing for shattered bones.

In the dark, wishing for a knock at the door.

In the dark, wishing for a doctor.

In the dark, vertigo of dead drunk punk decibels.

In the dark, deer on the road.

8.

“Do you remember that list of words I read a few times earlier? Tell me as many words from the list as you can remember in any order.”

9.

A cormorant stands black                                                    every sentence carries

sentry on a wooden piling

as the sea tucks itself in.                                                     a cost.

Claire Lacey currently lives in the UK. She holds an MA in English from the University of Calgary and a BA from York University. Her first book, Twin Tongues, won the Robert Kroetsch Award for Innovative Poetry. Her work has also appeared in Dandelion, The Windsor Review, and Filling Station. Claire currently blogs at ukcanuck.com

the Tuesday poem is curated by rob mclennan